Creating a Safety Net

I think all of us, at one point or another, have gone off the deep end.

I was describing this to my hubby last night. Falling into a binge is like falling off a cliff. It takes NO time. It takes NO effort. All you need to do is let go, for just a second, and you are falling. When you finally smash at the bottom, you then have to claw your way back up to where you were. This, of course, takes much longer than the decent. It will likely take longer than when you did it the first time, as well.

 It's a horrible place to be. Not just physically, but most of the time, bingers feel overwhelming shame, guilt and even hatred for themselves.

 I know all about this.

 So, I was thinking. I plan for everything. I mean, I am a true planner. Having a plan in place feels... safe. The one thing, I realized, that I DON'T have a plan for, is a binge. Or rather, a plan to STOP a binge when I am right on the edge. When I realize I have white-knuckled it for a little too long, and letting go is looking like a real possibility. Not only looking like a possibility, but looking GOOD.

 It is at THIS point, that I NEED a plan.

 A safety net, if you will.

 

 I'm still sorta in the middle of hashing this out. Maybe you guys can give some feedback. I need to come up with some kind of intervention to implement when I am really right on the verge. "Cookie-in-hand" kind of verge. Now remember, this is a total mental game here, so I have to play the game to my advantage. The urge to binge or eat something that can LEAD to a binge usually comes fast and furious, but it also will subside in time. Here are some of my ideas:

-Tell myself that I can have "the cookie(s)" (Obviously, whatever food is on the radar) after I have do at least 20 (30? 40?) minutes of exercise. If, after that 20 minutes I still want to eat the junk, I eat it. (Usually after a good workout, the last thing I want to do is eat junk that will undo all my hard work… this is, of course, the mental game.)

-Jump on Facebook and look at all of the posts from Tuff Girl Fitness. Christa is always posting inspirational and motivational quote, pics and comments. Members post their triumphs. It's awesome. Reading them always makes me feel uplifted and stronger.

-Make a list that I can have access to in a pinch (keep it in the purse, or something) that can list some of the following: WHY I am doing this, BEFORE pic of myself, list of goals I have set and their DEADLINES...

 This is what I have come up with so far. I want to really make a solid plan that I will feel comfortable falling on if needed, not something flimsy that would be easy to dismiss in the thick of my screwy mental status.

 It's really disappointing to be coming off of a significant (for me) binge. I've undone work I had done the week prior. I'm still recovering physically, and mentally I am bashing myself big-time. Trying to just move on. It's incredible how easy it is for weight to come back on, and how f*cking hard it is to take off. Seems so unfair. But, we can't dwell on "unfair". It doesn't get us to our goals.

So, what do you think? Other ideas on creating the safety net? I've heard the standard "Drink a big glass of water", "Call a friend"... these are flimsy. Water is not going to help, and I dont have any friends who could possibly understand what it's like to be going through something like that... Lay it on me!