I spent most of Sunday this weekend in my car. 2 hour ride to New Jersey and a 2 hour ride back. For 2 hours in between I spent time with a dear friend, Maggie, from my Michigan days who is having her first baby. I was excited and felt honored to have been invited to her shower. She is going to be such a great mama! Sometimes when I see a happy/glowy pregnant lady, I start to think about a 3rd.
Then I come to my senses.
Going into a social situation where I don’t know a soul (save 1 or 2) makes me incredibly anxious. When I was obese, it was simply not an option. I would run and hide from such gatherings. I did this exact thing when Maggie had her bridal shower. I said I would go, and then I baled. I just couldn’t emotionally handle it. I know this was very disappointing to her, and I don’t blame her one bit.
So, while I was still incredibly nervous – ESPECIALLY driving so far on my own – my weight was not nearly as much of a factor. It’s a good thing too, because the rest of Maggie’s friends may or may not have looked like freaking super models. Just sayin’.
My biggest, awesome-est “ah-ha” moment was about the food (I know – shock). Well, let me re-phrase – it WASN’T about the food.
It’s been a while since I’ve been at a gathering like this, but I remember distinctly that each time I attended something I have been in one of two mind-sets. I was either going to “be bad” and binge on all the food, or I was going to “be good” and worry/obsess about what was in each dish.
Yesterday – I was of NEITHER mindset.
And it was AMAZING.
I didn’t worry/wonder/obsess about the food. There was food. I ate some. It was very, very delicious. And that was it. There was no overeating of the apps laid out, because I wasn’t that hungry. Lunch consisted of trying little of a few of the things offered, and no seconds, because I was not hungry for them. On top of which, I didn’t have to STOP myself from doing it – it just happened that way.
I left before dessert was officially served, so Maggie insisted I take some things with me. I chose 2 different mini things and took my little covered plate with me in the car. Once I got my bearings on the highway, I tried the goods, and they were just too sweet for me. I ended up tossing them when I stopped for gas.
The old me, besides being obsessive, would have:
1. Devoured those treats as soon as I was a safe distance from the house, and alone.
2. Eaten them even though they tasted too sweet for me.
These realizations felt so incredibly good to me. I started thinking about them on my long drive home and I felt so content.
REST: ah yes. Rest. That thing you are supposed to do every 4-6 weeks while lifting or doing very intense workouts. That thing I have NOT done since I came back full throttle from my surgery in March.
Last week was tough for me physically and mentally. My workouts felt a lot harder. I couldn’t push myself through the full intervals. This is very unusual. Because physically I felt so much weaker, my mental fortitude took a big wallop.
Instead of just trying to push through it. I consulted with the trusted few I go to when I’m struggling. Across the board, the question was the same “When was the last time you took a rest/de-load week?”
ME: “uhhhhh…………”
Them: “Yeah. You need to rest”
Rest makes me nervous. I have visions of attempting my heavier lifts and feeling like I have slid back instead of making strides forward. Then I saw this great quote from Girls Gone Strong: “Strength isn’t only on the bar”
How true that is.
My physical and mental weakness this past week needs to be addressed. Regardless of how it effects me NEXT week at the bar, it STILL has to happen for me NOW.
Because I need to be strong in ALL aspects, not just in iron.
So, this week is a “rest” week. I will still go to the gym, and hubby is going to join me. We will work functional fitness (Squats, lunges, pushups, pull-ups, core etc) but will keep plyo on the light end. This is good for the hubby too, because he is just starting to get back to the gym. Win-Win.
How was your weekend? Any realizations?
Only the same realization I have every weekend; I put way too much on my to do list! Ha ha ha. :-)
ReplyDeleteAhhhh yes!!! I know that too! :-)
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