Friday, December 31, 2010

New Years Eve

New Years Eve. Just sat down after it took hours to get both kids to sleep. Even as I type this, I hear one stirring and I am praying he won't wake up.
I've said it before - I don't like resolutions. But, there is something refreshing about January 1. Especially 1/1/11. Will I wake up in the morning miraculously better from my cold? Will my kids? No, but, can I use the momentum of 1/1/11 to help me feel more positive about my life in the coming year? Yes, I think I can.
I plan on getting up in the AM and hitting the gym. I have a lesson to teach and then I am getting a wonderful hair cut and color. That always makes me feel like a new woman.My only other goal for tomorrow is to simply return to the way things normally are. Use my protein shakes, stick with my proteins, and do this until my cleanse begins on the 9th. I really feel as though this change in diet is going to be eye opening for me. I am very excited about it.
I have a lot of goals for 2011. (Mind you, NOT resolutions) Here are some I have been thinking about
1. Get and maintain a full time job with benefits - ASAP
2. Get to my goal weight of 180
3. Run at least 2 more 5K races. (My first one back after winter will be March 6)
4. Explore plastic surgery options for my panniculectomy (a version of a tummy tuck) and arm lift.
5. Continue toward my goal of becoming a weight loss and fitness consultant.
6. Catch up on my student loans and get rid of my credit card debt.
7. Feel happier. Not sure what exactly will help me do this. Time? Moving on in my career change? Sammy sleeping through the night? Who knows, but something has to do it.
Boy, the list got longer as I was typing. LOL
I don't like to put time stamps on my goals - it seems to stress me out unnecessarily and then I tend to self-sabotage. So, I will simply say that these are what I want to accomplish this year. And I CAN do it, because I can do ANYTHING.
So, what do YOU want to accomplish this year?

Thursday, December 30, 2010

Goal setting - just for today

As I mentioned in my previous post, I love goal setting. I've been so thrown off the past few weeks, that I am taking baby steps toward the beginning of the cleanse on Jan. 9. So, today, these are my health goals:
1. Drink at least 64 oz of water
2. log everything I eat on
- now, this food log will not be perfect, and I will likely go over my calorie allotment, however, I WILL write down everything I eat.
3. Get in some kind of physical activity, even though I am still sore from my last Tuff Girl workout. (Gym or workout at home)
4. Get some rest

Just wanted to throw that down - helps keep me moving in the right direction.

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

2011 - "Cleansing" away 2010

I am not a resolution maker. Resolutions are made to be broken. Goal creating is different, and I don't just utilize it in the new year. Goal creating should be an ongoing part of peoples lives, whether it's regarding work, family, health or anything else.
The only goal I have so far for 2011 is that it's going to be a better year than 2010.
Too much loss and too much grief have overshadowed the positives that have come from this year, like my beautiful son, Samuel.
One thing I am looking forward to is doing the Tuff Girl/Bodyology cleanse starting 1/9/11. It's not a crazy drink-only-juice, or eat-only-cabbage-soup, or starve-yourself-delirious kind of "cleanse". It's really just a get-rid-of-the-crap-you-have-consumed-over-the-holidays kind of plan. Without saying too much, out of respect for Christa Doran (, it's a 13 day "clean" eating plan. A sensible, real food plan. No caffeine, no sugar, no processed foods. Will it be tough? yes. Will it be worth it? YES. I KNOW I will feel like a new woman after getting all the "holidays" out of my system. Is it the way I am going to eat forever? Maybe, but probably not. But I am hoping it will give me some great alternatives to the same-old foods I have been eating. Sound wonderful to you? Visit the site and sign up!!
I'm in the midst of my online Psych class and it is tough. Probably not the right class to take online my first time back to school in a long time, but it is what it is, and I have to do well. So, I am stressed, but I will endure, prevail, and move on.

Monday, December 27, 2010


Well, as you can probably tell from my workout schedule, its been a tough 2 weeks.
We have been through a lot recently. A terrible stomach bug that swept my entire family (19 members at last count, plus some from Anthony's family) and on Dec 20, my precious Mema passed away in hospice care. She was diagnosed with lung cancer with mets to the brain on Oct. 27. Approx a month later it was found to be in her liver. She was admitted to hospice care and passed 2 weeks later, without pain, surrounded by her daughters. You think you have prepared yourself for it, knowing how ill she became and how quickly it spread, but you can never be fully prepared to be left by your second mother. My Mema meant the world to me. I miss her so much. I called her house, knowing she wouldn't answer. I closed my eyes and imagined her sweet voice saying "hello?" and I cried. Sometimes I still can't believe she is gone.
Christmas has come and gone. I struggled to make it happy and exciting for my boys. It took so much energy just to do that, but I feel like they had a nice day. My family came over and we also go together the next day. We all had a shot amaretto in honor of Mema. *sigh* This was also the first X-mas without my cousin Brian, which would have been hard enough. It's just been a really hard year.
On to career/school/work info - my online class has begun and I tried to get some of the work done yesterday and I am determined to get some done today. It's a very short period of time to get all of this done, but I have to do it. Just do it.
I had a great job interview at Yale. I am feeling very confident I will receive a call soon and will begin work after the new year. I will NOT count my chickens yet, but I am feeling good. I know I have mentioned before, but one wonderful thing about Yale is that they will pay for my Gateway classes.
On January 4, I can go into Gateway and sign up for 2 classes for the Spring on a payment plan, since even if I do get the job at Yale, my benefits won't start for 30 days.
I'm back on my workout schedule - I hope anyway. There is a blizzard going on currently (yes, literally) so I am hoping to get to the gym later, or I can do a workout at home. I am dragging my sis-in-law, Sarah, to a Tuff Girl Bootcamp tomorrow morning and I am very excited. After all the holiday eating, I am feeling sluggish and I can't wait to clean things up. Still considering doing the Tuff Girl cleanse. I have to check the finances to see if it's possible. Of course, I will report here all about it.
That's all for now. I am hoping this coming year is a better one for my family.

Sunday, December 12, 2010

5K... or, not so much

Well, I should be just about crossing the finish line at a 5K race this morning, but when we woke up to high winds, pouring rain, and cold temps - plus finishing 2 concerts in a row and having 2 sick kids, we decided to punk out on this one.
I am not disappointed.
My last run on the treadmill was my best time yet 41:13. I am really super excited about it. I have shaved 6 minutes off my longest time. That's awesome. I am very proud. I want to keep it up so that when the races start again in spring, I'll be really ready.
Things career wise are moving - slowly. I can being work on my online Psych class on Monday, so I plan on devoting 1 hour each night, starting Monday, to doing that, so that I am not overwhelmed. I have never taken an online only class, and frankly, I haven't been in class, as a student, for a while. I'm a little nervous, but I am sure I can make it happen. It may be stressful, but I'll get it done.
There are a few things I am working on in regards to classes. There is a class called Fundamentals of Human Communication required for both majors - however, I am trying to propose that my years of teaching in the class room should equate to that. I mean, how much more can I learn about human communications when I have had to do it as a career for the past 4 years? I am hoping they will see that my way. We will see.
I have another interview for a job at Yale tomorrow. I am feeling very confident. Once I start there, they will pay for classes, so I will just need to put out the money for this semester. No biggie. I found the kids a great care facility. Nursery school for Josh 3 full days a week, and care for Sammy 2 full days, with the other days being at Grandma's. I think it's a nice compromise, especially for Josh, who needs school and playmates and interactions. It doesn't feel as hard as it once did.
There are so many things going on personally. Christmas is coming, job searching, classes, kids, hubby, housework, Mima in hospice, concerts, lessons, workouts, eating plans... wow, when I list it like that I wonder how it all works out, but somehow we are making it work.
So, today is just another day of balancing it all. Lessons, grocery shopping, gym, Mima, kids, trying not to get sick, prepping for interview... all in a days work, I guess.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010


Still working on the job front. Hoping to hear about an interview this week for a good position with Yale Transplant... cross your fingers!
I can't register until Jan 4 because I need to go on a payment plan for my classes this semester. The good thing is I contacted my advisor and she said she would sign me into Nutrition 1, if it is full by that point. Nice! Then, I can find something else to take, because I want to be at 6 credits.
I am beginning a revamp to my eating as well.
"If you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always gotten" - Anthony Robbins
I have been wondering why, with all my workouts, I haven't been losing weight. I mean really, it has taken me about 3 months to drop 10 pounds. Each one is a struggle. When I was at my boot-camp workout class yesterday, I was listening to some of the ladies talking about a clean-eating cleanse they have started. No pills, powders, juices - just real food, non-processed. No sugar, no caffeine, no CHEESE - ACK! I was going to do this cleanse - but frankly, I was afraid to give up the caffeine and cheese. However, the more I thought about it, the more I realized that my fear was exactly why I HAVE to do it. Tuff Girl Christa is running another one in January and I am on board. Before that, however, I am going to being weaning myself from some of these things.
At first I thought - no problem. I will start with taking out the sugar. I don't eat that much sugar - but as I can attest today, I must have been eating more than I thought. I was a raving lunatic. So, another few days of really taking out all the sugar (because that didn't QUITE happen today - although no "treat" sugars. I know that sounds like an excuse, but I have been really falling into the treat-a-day habit, so that was big for me). Then, on to the caffeine. I am trying to wean off gradually, since I value my families lives, and to quit cold-turkey would surely lead to blood-shed. Finally, cheese will be weaned as well. I have to replace this protein gap with more meats (organic) and fish. This is going to take some work, but I really understand now why I have to do it. My days are filled with caffeinated protein shakes and cheese - obviously the reason my body is rejecting weight loss.
Well, there is a lot to do. Today, I upped my water a lot, ran my 5K in my best time yet, and didn't let anything sway me from my workout. These are the things I am proud of today. There are some things I'm NOT proud of, but I am moving on from that.
Every moment is a new moment to make a good choice. Keep moving.