Pushing through

Friday, 3:55. I cannot wait to get out of work...I feel so tired today!
Tired leads to feeling munchy. Why do these two things go together?

Bags of candy, caramel corn and chocolate cookies sat out in the office (across from my desk) most of the day.

Yesterday, there was cheesecake.

Oh yes, there was cheesecake.

This girl didn't touch a MORSEL of ANY of it. I ate my plan, drank my coffee and my water.

I won't say I wasn't tempted, because I really was, but I didn't give in.
I found myself at a food crossroad. This is when the IFG (Inner Fat Girl) says "It's fine to just have a bite. Just go ahead. I mean, it's CHEESECAKE! You are so tired, and it will give you energy!"

No fat girl, No.

Because one bite is too many and a thousand is not enough.
AS soon as I start, I can't stop.

So, I have to continuously monitor myself not to start. Not to take that one little step across the line that leads me into insanity. It's never, ever, ever "just a bite".

So, it figures that as I gear up to begin my 5K training, New England decides to actually become New England in the winter, and temps are plunging into the teens. Running in the cold. Not my idea of fun. I will probably still try it tomorrow, during the "warmest" part of the day. It's a start - only 25 minutes. I have good winter gear to wear, so I think I will be good.

Tomorrow morning is another workout at Bodyology. Training twice a week there is different. I am just recovering from the soreness of Wednesday, and I'll be back for more tomorrow! But, different workout.

The other night on the way home from my weight-heavy workout there, I thought about how good it feels after you are done. I'm not just talking about the mental satisfaction, but for me, when my muscles are cooling down and relaxing after I have worked them hard, it feels so good. Like when you crawl into bed after a long day and your whole body just relaxes. That's kinda the feeling. It's awesome. And I ALWAYS sleep like a ROCK that night. I guess it's one of those things that keeps me going back for me. A different type of addiction, maybe? Eh, at least it's a healthy one!

Weekends are usually tough on the food, but I am committed to keeping my steady pace. Keep moving forward. I hope all of you out there are doing the same!!

Oh yea, I... I will survive...

Yes, yes, I survived my workout last night. I lifted heavier weights than I thought I could, and did WAY more mountain climbers on gliders than I ever thought I could (or EVER WANTED to do!)

At one point, the word "hate" came to mind as I glared toward my amazing trainer... in the most loving way possible. She is seriously awesome and helps keep me going way past when I start to think "I can't..."

I have to figure out a running schedule. I am starting to see that the rest of my team for the Rugged Maniac (we are called the Bodyology Bruisers - NICE!) is further along in the running department than I am, and it makes me nervous. At least it's something I can work on on my own... but I need to not only work on my 5K running, but sprinting as well. A Rugged Maniac is not so much a 5K run as a sprint from one obstacle to the next.

I could begin with C25K - 35 minutes a day. This is not a lot of time, but I am trying desperatly to find it in the day. Even at night, for crying out loud! I could try getting up at 5:00 and running first thing... but sometimes Thing 2 is already up, so I don't know... I have a hard time getting up in the morning and exercising. My body feels awful and heavy and it just doesn't want to move. But maybe I just have to get used to it?

Well, that might be my only option. If I get up early and go, that means the hubby has an opportunity to go running later in the day (he wants to start running again as well)

All things to think about.

Food is going great. I am going heavy protein and only carbs in veggies, fruits, and some in my protein powder and these AWESOME protein donuts I made. I have been having one or two at night (they are mini) and the stats are phenomenal. 60 cals each, 5 grams carbs, 3 grams fiber, 8 grams protein. How can you beat that? Oh, yes, and they are DELISH.

I am happy with how my body feels eating like this. I don't subscribe to high fat foods, so I stick with lean proteins, low fat cheese, and even using 3 whole eggs and 3 egg whites in my mini bites, instead of 6 whole eggs. I am constantly trying to lower the fat and cholesterol in whatever I am doing, without, of course, adding carbs and sugar.

This is my food for today:
Click coffee
5 mini bites
2 low fat cheese sticks
2 Morningstar Veggie sausage patties
1 tbs natural peanut butter
strawberries
broccoli and hummus
more Click (if I'm in the mood later)
dinner might be mini turkey meatballs in homemade sauce, or Mexican chicken salad. Or maybe, if I have time to throw it together - buffalo chicken spread with some carrots and celery.
2 protein donuts.

Not sure how many calories I am consuming overall. I'm not tracking right now, because it tends to throw me off my groove. The reason, I think, is my calories tend to be higher when I am on high protein, and that freaks me out. I am absolutely in a groove right now, and I am attempting to stay away from the things that throw me off.

So, I weighed again this morning... I know, I know. I'm trying not to get obsessive, but I am just wondering where my body is at after being sick this weekend. I thought I would be up a little from my weigh in yesterday, but surprisingly enough, I am DOWN - 215.

I'm not logging this as a loss, I don't think, but it's REALLY good to know! Hooray!!

So, tell me blog-land - how many of you were NOT morning people, but have converted for exercise sake??

Whew! Feeling better, and weigh in results

Whew! Ok, I am feeling *LOTS* better! After I wrote yesterday I decided to really focus on drinking water and put a little food in my belly. When I realized it didn't hurt after eating and drinking and I was actually beginning to feel better - well, it was all sunshine and roses from there.

Well, maybe not quite, but you get my drift.

Tonight, training session at Tuff Girl - bands and discs. This is one of those workouts I tend to shy away from, because it exposes my terrible balance and lack of core strength. Therefore, I thought it was important to put it in the schedule.
For those who may not know about discs:

Yes, they look innocent enough. But damn, they work you like crazy. You can do moves like this:

They are also used for things like side lunges, mountain climbers, ab saws, body drags, just to name a few.

Frankly, I am still working on keeping myself up on them when I am in plank. Those bitches are slippery! (Um, Duh Kel)

So, I will work my ass off tonight - yes, literally.

I wrote a little about my next adventure, which will be running a "Rugged Maniac" 5K in MA in September. Check out the trailer HERE
It's going to be awesome, but I have a lot of work to do. But I have 9 months. I was thinking that to myself the other day, and I thought "9 months - well, in 9 months you can make a whole new person" (actually thinking about pregnancy) but it's really true - I can make myself a whole new person in 9 months. A person who is strong enough to conquer craziness like this mud-run. Not just conquer it, but have FUN doing it!

Ok, so, on to the weigh in. This morning the scale said..............
217

So, that would be a 5 lbs loss from last week. It could be a little less because of being sick. But, just as a marker, I weighed myself yesterday morning and it read 211, because of the drastic amount of fluid I had lost from being sick. It is because of this gage that I think 217 might be about right. I am going to check again on Friday to make sure I'm not too off.

But, can I just take a moment and say: SWEET

Ok peeps - I'm out for now. Maybe back later. Keep strong, everyone!

Uggghhhh.....

a very, very short update. Got an awful stomach bug from my minions this weekend, and although my tummy feels better, my body feels like it's been hit by a truck.
Something I am very proud of - I never went to carbs the whole time. Everyone has heard you should eat saltine crackers and the like when recovering. I didn't. I sipped my water and really just started eating again the morning. Ok, drinking really. I'm a little weary of food.
My weigh in tomorrow morning will be skewed because of all the water loss. I will still weigh in, but I won't change my ticker till I feel like normal. Then perhaps I will weigh again on Friday to see what's what.
I have lots to write, and no energy. So, I'll be back later

New Training and New Crazy

Good afternoon, my minions... lol, sorry. I've been calling Thing 1 and Thing 2 that lately and they think it's funny... till Thing 1 started saying it, and I thought it probably wouldn't make him very popular at school, so I stopped. Ok, it's over.

I've decided to start training for a race called a Rugged Maniac in MA. It's taking place in September. I have always been fascinated by races like these, and now that the opportunity is presenting itself, well, I am going to swallow my fear and just do it. It gives me a good amount of time to train. In order to do so, I have fully committed to 2 workouts per week at Bodyology and this weekend I am going to establish a combination running schedule.

Why yes, yes it IS insane. Thanks for asking!

My schedule, when the semester starts, will looks like this:

M: work 7:30-4:30, class 5:20-6:40
T: work 7:30-4:30, class 5:20-8:10
W: work 7:30-4:30, class 5:20-9:50 (no, that's not a typo)
R: work 7:30-4:30, Bodyology 6:00-7:00, Church choir 7:30-9:00
F: work 7:30-4:30
S: Bodyology 8:00-9:00
S: Church 9:00-11:00, teaching (every other) 12:00-4:30

This doesn't include being involved in any kind of show with the theater company.

My children are going to forget what I look like and my husband is going to feel like a single father.

Is this selfish? School and training?

The company is going have to perform without me, I think. I just can't swing it. The hubs is going to love that!

Maybe it's all too much. But what gives? What has to go? I wish it could be work! LOL, then I could train and take classes during the day and see my sweet boys at night! *Sigh* But my school doesn't happen without work (tuition reimbursment), and neither does Thing 1's. He needs to be in pre-school. He's SO SO smart and they are helping him really prepare for kindergarten...

I don't want to miss out on time with my boys, but I want to move beyond myself and do something I never thought I could. I want to be a role model for them. I don't know what to do.

Weigh in Day

I know, it's weird, right? Weighing in on a Wednesday?

Well, that was when I woke up last week and said "Enough of this shit!"
So, weighed in this morning at 222. I am down 3 lbs.

I'm happy enough with it. I was hoping for more, but I was not exactly on par all weekend, so I kinda expected it too.

So, on tap today - work, obviously. Packed all my food. This morning is the last morning I will start off my morning with a Starbucks Skinny Mocha. I am officially out of gift cards, so that will be that.

Besides, I have my Click to keep me warm...lol

Tonight - workout... hmmmm... I am still really sore from my workout on Monday. Actually, even more so today (2 days after is always the worst for me) but the soreness is mostly upper body, so I need to do some strong lower body cardio tonight. Maybe I'll pop in the TurboFire - that is crazy cardio and not too much upper body. Some burpees, but I should be ok.

Last night I attempted an elevated leg plank:

I was up on my hands, and I held it for about 30 seconds. My arms were just too sore to do more. But I was pretty impressed that I did it. It didn't suck as bad as I thought it would. :-)

I was thinking this morning: I spent a lot of time thinking that other peoples ways of eating should be MY way of eating, and not getting anywhere. Regardless of what works for others, I have to stick with what works for ME - or, what is the point???

It's especially important to remember that when I am in school learning about nutrition, and researching all different eating theories.

Those other theories are NOT wrong, they are just different from what I feel I need to do, and they work for other people!

I wish I could spend all day just cooking and planning and working out. Doesn't everyone? But, work beckons.

Work your plans, everyone!! Whatever works for you - WORK IT!

2012 - here I come!

Here we are, the first post of the New Year. 2012 - what changes will you bring?

I have made a great transition back into low carbing it. Feels good. I don't feel hungry. As a matter of fact, I had to remind myself to eat a few times yesterday, and was able to totally avoid mall food yesterday, even as everyone else ate lunch. I munched a few almonds, drank some water, and simply waited till I got home to eat.

Yesterday, I went on a mini cooking spree. At least enough to get us into the week. I made Mexican turkey breast, with my own seasonings, salsa, sweet corn and black beans. Made so much it could last us the week!

I also made turkey cheese BITES. They are so fab. Click the link to go to see Shelly at "Eggface". She makes awesome WLS friendly recipes.

I also tried her protein donuts in my new little Donut maker.

It's super easy to use, and best of all - no frying!

I played with Shelly's donut recipe, and they really came out beautifully. Sugar free, filled with protein and fiber, very low in carbs (no flour!)
Even Thing 1 loves them! The donut King himself!

Went to a super hardcore workout last night at Bodyology last night. I lifted some really heavy weights. I did stiff legged dead-lifts with 60 lbs. I did goblet squats with 35lbs. I did Landmines with 75lbs. I threw 20 lbs medicine balls around, planked with the best of 'em, and jump roped, rowed and push-uped my way into a sweaty mess.

Then I did it all over again.

Needless to say, I felt pretty badass.

I also feel pretty sore today. lol

But that feeling of pushing through. The amazing connection I feel with the ladies there, who I watch in amazement as they all push as hard as they can - and then push harder... and even more amazing, just at the moment I feel like I need to stop, Christa is right there, pushing me through with words of power and encouragement.

I've missed going so much.

I am glad I decided to take the plunge and start going back. I am going to strive for 2 times a week, however, once school starts, I don't know. I may have to go down to one. But, I want it to go back to being consistent again. I can't let things get in my way on this one. This must remain a priority!!

Speaking of priorities - this is my only New Year's Resolution:

1. Establish my priorities and work accordingly.

My resolutions have always been weight loss in nature. That doesn't help me. Goals are good, but making a resolution means nothing to me. So, why should I bother making out a big list of things? My one goal right now encompasses my life. Priorities are tough for me to organize. So, it makes sense to work on that, thus, working on everything!

Well, THAT sounds too good to work! LOL We will see!

So, here I am, low-carbing, Metabolic Effect-learning, working-out queen.

Welcome to my Kingdom.