Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Warning, long and sorta rambling...

Woh, this weekend was a whirlwind. I hardly remember it was a 3 day weekend for me!
Battled some major demons on Sunday evening. My mom took the boys for the night, which was so nice. Hubs and I got some quiet time alone. As soon as we dropped the boys off, my mind went to food. Crazy, right? I suddenly wanted nothing more than to go and buy heart shaped boxes of chocolate, buy pizza, go home and eat. Eat where I could be uninterrupted by anything and everyone while I fed my addiction.
I felt sickened just thinking about it. Not by the food itself, but by myself and my urge. I was also disappointed because just the evening before, we had triumphed over sweets in the house that were here because of a company meeting we were holding. We totally rocked it! Only the most healthy stuff consumed! All the sweets sent away with the rest of the troupe!we were amazing!and NOW I was going to flounder??
Luckily for me, I have an amazing husband I am able to share these things with. It was hard, but I told him exactly what I was thinking and I told him I really needed support. He was amazing. He guided us to the store, not to buy food, but to buy the face masks we needed to run in the cold. We went home, changed quickly, and at 6:30 PM, in 17degree weather, we went out and ran our first round of C25K. Yes. We ran, in the dark, in the cold, and it felt awesome. We then went home and made a huge, protein filled salad and drank our water. we got a fabulous nights sleep.
I know that my hubby was pivotal in helping me fight my IFG that night. We beat her down with running, and healthy eats. We beat her down with support. I am so, so lucky.
So, yesterday was C25K day 2. Felt good. My feet are getting used to running again. They are achy, but what can you do? Small price to pay for feeling awesome otherwise. the program I am working with is a 3 day per week format. This works well right now. I am going to try to move it along a little faster, to be ready for my first 5k I'm over a year, on March 4. This is an 8 week plan, and I need it to be done in about 6... Well, all I can do is try.
Food has been really good. Very happy with my choices over the weekend, especially in light of my struggles. Weigh in tomorrow morning. Hoping it will show my hard work. Tuff Girl workout tomorrow night.
I was thinking about my workout on Saturday at Bodyology. I was not happy with myself at all. I came home from it and cried instead of feeling the pride i normally do after a great workout there. I felt weak, out of shape, and I felt like the fat girl at the party. It all started when we were warming up and I was watching myself in the mirror. I critiqued every wobble, every flabby bit. It went down hill from there. I put myself into that situation by not seeing myself as awesome for being there and working like a BEAST. I have promised myself I am going to work hard, not only physically, but mentally, to make myself strong and confident.
Until next time, peeps. Stay strong and care on!


  1. My inner fat girl is poking me right now. I'm fighting her. I have a feeling this might be a nightly battle for a long while, but I'm taking a cue from you and not noshing tonight! We can do this! (PS--yay for running in the cold and dark!! That's freakin' intense lady! Also-yay Kelliann's hubby for running in the cold with her!)

  2. Beat her down Ana!! You can do it! At night, once I feel like it's getting really tough to fight her, I gather my things and go to BED! LOL

  3. You have a very supportive and amazing husband! My husband does the same thing for me and he has no idea how helpful he is to me at times!