Thursday, November 8, 2012

All the struggles...

I am reading in a lot of blogs about a lot of struggles. I am also reading very FEW excuses. People just fessing up to mistakes and outlining plans to fix the mistakes. Honest people making honest, human mistakes.

Most have resulted in weight gain, just as mine have.

There are so many reasons for us mere humans to get off track. I'm not talking about the "oh, well, my favorite cupcakes we on sale and I just COULDN'T pass it up!" or "Well, it's in the house because my kids NEED to have it and I couldn't HELP myself!"  I'm talking about deaths, destruction of property, fear, intense stress, and Mutha f*cking Nature. Seems as though Mutha has screwed a LOT of us up, big time. Some waaaaayyyyy more than others, and in more ways than just food and exercise.

But I also see responsibility being taken. And in that, I see love and support being given. Tough love sometimes, when it's needed. But it's all support. We are here together, and we are fighting for the same things- our lives.

Sorry if the entry starts to get a little disoriented. The medication I'm on makes me feel super tired.

I missed my workout last night. Because I work in the basement, with no windows, I had no true idea about how bad it was getting out. The highway was practically closed. Just getting to my car on the shuttle took 20 minutes (a 5 min drive normally), and an hour to get home from there, using back roads, thank goodness. I knew as soon as I hit the streets that heading in the opposite direction for a workout, only to then have to turn around and go home was just not happening. I would LOVE to say I got in a sweat session at home, but by the time I got home I was wiped out.

This morning, I got my period, which explains a TON too - including why I am so GD hungry today.
This is what I have had SO FAR:

coffee with almond milk
huge chai tea
B: oats, 1/2 banana, 1 tbs+ natural PB
S: PB on flax wrap
L: 2 helpings of spaghetti squash bake
S: banana

Still to come:
S: hummus with small pita
D: ground turkey with spicy Mexican spices, 2 oz red fat cheese, lots of salsa, 1/2 sweet potato
S: gorge on chocolate cheesecake... Just kidding. That will only be in my mind. However, I may have some unsweetened cocoa powder in hot water with a few drops of stevia.

I will not be exercising tonight. Math class after work (in which I find out my fate on a terrible test I took on Tuesday. I'm mentally preparing myself for a C, so I don't cry when I see it), then quick home to grab dinner and off to choir practice.

This week needs to be over.


  1. I definitely see a lot of the same things on the blogs I read (seeing it in myself, too!)... people dealing with lots of stress/tragedy/etc, but DEALING with it, not just losing themselves in food... not to say there aren't mistakes being made, but no one is saying "Well, such and such happened, guess I'll just go eat cake, there's nothing else to do." It's comforting to see people moving forward, even under adverse circumstances.

  2. So many affected by Sandy are displaying such resiliency. I can't imagine being in the circumstances dealt and don't know how I would be coping. Math huh? I'm in social services so I didn't have to take math except for one stats course which I'm sure my prof finally passed me out of pity:)