Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Priorities and check in

9:00 PM and literally the first moment I have had to update for the day. But here I am!

I am feeling super overwhelmed with work. My co-worker being out has seriously thrown me for a loop. When I left for the day, I had just gone through 15 voice mails. Every time I answered the phone, the other line rang, and someone was standing over my shoulder needing me... I almost cried at one point.

The thing is about this job - I work with patients. A lot of them are very sick. Some have cancer. They are ALL a priority, so "prioritizing" is extremely difficult. *sigh* Ok, breathing, and moving on.

Eats for today:
Click and soy
Morningstar Sausage, 2 tbs PB
Large salad, with home made dressing, olives, almonds, craisins... delish
1/2 sweet potato, 3 oz seasons turkey breast, 2 oz red. fat cheese, salsa
Click and soy
Totals for today: 1422

Exercise - DEATH BY WORKOUT. I'm not kidding, that's what it was called. Christa at Tuff Girl has the cutest little names for the workouts over there. (note the sarcasm). For real, it was incredibly intense. I almost threw up, and I almost cried. But I did it. I made it. I never gave up. PLUS - I am closer than ever to doing a real pull-up. Put THAT in your pipe and SMOKE it! (please note, I am not actually encouraging anyone to smoke anything. It is merely and expression)

Now, I am going to take a long, hot shower and crawl into bed. I will then pray earnestly to God to make these next 2 days go quickly without crying or hyperventilating.

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Wow, what a mistake!

I wished I had entered all of my food before I ate that snack...
I was really, really hungry by 3:00 and so I had my snack-that-shall-not-be-named (Kashi Cereal and almonds)... Then I went on my merry way and entered all my food in Livestrong...
Holy. Shit. That stupid snack cost me almost 400 freaking calories. Are you JOKING??? That stupid cereal is almost 200 cals for a freaking serving?? WHAT???
So, now, after entering in dinner, I am already at 1527 cals for the day... grrr... that means NO room for any error... and MUST do Kickboxing tonight!

Happy Tuesday

Ok, blogging everyday has me hurtin' for catchy titles....

Happy Tuesday, peeps. So happy it is Tuesday, and not Monday. However, in my experience, "short" weeks ususally feel really "long". Hm. Time will tell.

I weighed myself this morning. 206.8 - down from 211. Is that fat lose? Hell no. It's prolly mostly water. But, I'm glad to have it off.

Non-weight stuff: I am without my co-worker this week. It's already a little hellish. I am now taking care of 5 nurses instead of my normal 2. My phone will not stop ringing. I feel a little buried.

But, I am blessed to have a job. I really DO know that!

Ok, now on to more important matters: My blog is boring. I need to do more with pictures and such, I think. Something I am going to ponder. I read blogs that post pics of their food daily... maybe that's an idea? But, do you really want to see the same thing over and over? LOL

Speaking of food, here is the plan for today:
coffee: Click andd soy
B: 2 morningstar sausages, 2 tbs PB
L: 3 oz seasoned turkey breast, 2 oz Sargento reduced fat cheese, 1 Mission carb balance tortilla, 1 med banana
S:(if needed) 2/3 cup kashi cereal, 1 oz almonds*
D: large dinner salad with all *my* fixins (measured and weighed, of course!) with 3 oz grilled chicken breast
S: (if needed) apple and PB

* So, this snack is interesting to me. People probably wouldn't think much of it - high fiber cereal, good fat and protein... however, cereal can be a hit-or-miss thing with me re: my compulsive overeating. It *can* be a trigger, but it's not *always* a trigger... so, when I say "if needed", I mean, I'm REALLY going to try not to eat it. Why did I pack it, you ask? Because when I was searching for a snack to pack last night, it was one of the first relativly good options I saw. I was trying not to spend too much time in the kitchen, because I was avoiding snacking last night!


In case you are wondering, I did NOT snack last night. I was hungry once I was in bed, but I just went to sleep. I held at a little over 1300 some-odd calories yesterday. Just right, I think. I have not yet put my food into Livestrong today, but I am expecting about the same cals as yesterday... maybe even a little less!

Exercise today... hmmm... I don't know what I am going to do yet. Maybe a walk? Some "active" recovery, I think, but we will see how much energy I have later... maybe some kickboxing :-)

I have to run, 'cause my lunch break is over. Later peeps!

Monday, May 28, 2012

Memorial Day check in

Happy Memorial Day. Thank you to all of those who have served and continue to serve.
Here is my Monday check in:
Started the day with an amazing workout at Bodyology. I am SO glad I got in off the wait list! I would like to thank the 8 people in the class who decided they were not interested in getting their sweat on this morning, so that I could get in! Sweet!
Eats today:
Click and soy
morningstar sausage (2), 1 apple and 2 tbs PB
Another picnic today: 1 deli flat, 3 oz chicken burger (with gorgonzola and hot sauce - yum!), salad with balsamic (1 tbs), 2 oz chicken breast,
1/2 large sweet potato, 3 oz ground chicken breast (seasoned) 2 oz cabot 75% red. fat cheese, salsa
I'm hungry now, but I have had about all the calories I should for today: 1353
To have a snack, or not to have a snack... that is the question....
So, how was YOUR weekend? Did you stay on track?
Till tomorrow, peeps!

Sunday, May 27, 2012

Aren't you SO glad I am checking in all the time!?! :-)
This is just an update on my eats and workout for the day. I know, I know, I said I was going to get all introspective and such. Meh. I'm too tired for thinking too much.
So, dinner was mexican, as mentioned before. 3 oz of seasoned turkey breast, 2 oz of reduced fat cheese on 1/2 large sweet potato, 1 tbs light sour cream.
I did a "day off" Tabata workout - just 20 minutes. 3 rounds, 6 exercises. I felt kinda like a cheater, because at the studio with Christa, it would be 5 rounds of tabata and a finisher! This was certainly a "day off!"
After dinner I had 1 1/2 granny smith apple, nuked with 1 tbs natural peanut butter.
Calories for the day: 1456
Ok, I'm out - SO excited for the day off tomorrow! Hoping to get into a Tuff Girl workout in the AM - right now I am on the waiting list. :-) :-)
Super Duper fast check in -
VERY sore from yesterdays workout. Totally worth it. I jammed my ankle in an unfortunate burpee accident, and it's sore, but nothing crazy.
I don't have anything official on the exercise agenda today, but I think once the sun starts to go down I might go for a little jog/walk
Eats today:
Click protein shake with 1 cup light organic unsweetened soy, 1 cup water, lots of ice
1 oz almonds, 1 oz cabot 75% reduced fat cheese
1 veggie burger, 1/3 hamburger bun, .5 oz american cheese, 1/4 cup cole slaw, one all fruit frozen bar (very good! Only 80 cals!) (this is the best I could do at the picnic we went to!)
2 oz 75% red fat cabot cheese, 1 oz almonds
Dinner, I think, is going to be made-at-home Mexican. Using ground turkey breast, home made seasoning, spicy salsa, reduced fat cheese, Greek yogurt, and high fiber wrap - OR maybe even on a salad! Oohh! I think we have a winner!
I have not put my food in Livestrong yet. Will do that later and report back.
Although I wouldn't call this weekend clean eating at all, it's SO much better than binging and compulsively eating. I have the urge for sweets, especially in the heat, but I am doing well with staying away and I really feel good about the end result of the picnic lunch today (I had NO cake!)
Will be back later with a more introspective post on how things are. Right now, I am being run ragged by cranky, crazy, energetic 5 and 2 year old boys! ACK! I love my little minions!

Saturday, May 26, 2012

Saturday update

Saturday, Saturday. Started the day off with a kick ass Tuff Girl workout - The Down and Dirty Mud Run Workout. Rope climbs, bear crawls, pull ups, burpees with obstacle, body drags, dead lifts... and more! I know I have conquered a workout when at one point (at least) I think I won't be able to finish, and I do anyway, when I am dizzy at least once, and when I am seconds from collapse. Sounds like Hell, right? Nope, it's just Tuff Girl!

So, eats last night changed slightly. In the evening, after doing some kickboxing, I had my apple with 1 tbs of PB, and later had a 1.5 oz of 75%reduced fat cheese... I was SO hungry.
So I ended the day at just under 1600 calories, and I estimate I burned about 250-300 in my 45 minute kick-ass kickboxing.

Eats for today: Well, it's SO humid here today, that all I can think about is cold things!

Pre workout: 1 serving Click protein powder, 8 oz light soy, 8 oz water, LOTS of ice
B: 2 morningstar sausage patties, 2 tbs PB and 1 med apple
S: 2 oz red fat cheese
L: 2 cups chopped veggies, 2 pieces falafel, 2 tbs homemade dressing, 10 green olives, 1 oz almonds, 1 tbs craisins
S: Click shake (as above)
D: Unknown! We REALLY need to go to the grocery store!

So, so far today (Including the up-coming Click snack) I am up to 1100 calories. Because of the
incredibly intense workout, I know I will be upwards of 1600-1800 calories today. According to Livestrong, my bootcamp workout burned 600 calories. I don't normally trust those generic numbers. but damn, I think I was close!

Oh, and did I mention I dead-lifted 135 lbs this morning? Cause I DID!! :-D

Ok, that's is for now - family time!

Friday, May 25, 2012

Putting it out there

So, a while ago I wrote a post about being nervous to kinda put everything "out there" because of fear of judgement. Well, I've decided to bypass the worry and just do it.

As much as I am able, I will post what I am eating for the day (the good, the bad, the indifferent) and what activity I am doing. This is mostly for me, of course (cause, we are blogging for ourselves, right??) But hey, you never know - you might get a good idea about a quick work lunch, or be able to give me suggestions on something!

You can see I've got some new goals. They are over to the right --------------------->

My first goal is to get to 199. Under 200 lbs. I should have been there a year ago. But "should's" aren't going to help now. So, I will pursue one goal at a time.

I got on the scale this morning (ouch). 211. I thought I was around 205. So, goal #1 might take a little longer, but for now, I am keeping the date the same.

OK, on to eats today:

1 grande soy skinny Mocha - I've actually been good at staying away, but yesterday was payday, so I splurged.
B: 2 morningstar veggie sausages, 2 tbs natural peanut butter
S: 1 serving Click protein powder, 8 oz light, unsweetened soy milk, 8 oz water, lots of ice
L: 1 Mission Carb Balance tortilla, 2 tbs hummus, 1 serving Republic One Falafel, lots of lettuce, tomato, and red peppers
S: 1/5 oz Cabot 75 % red. fat cheese, 1 med banana
D: Dinner salad, lots of chopped veggies (about 2 cups), banana peppers, 1 oz red fat cheese, 10 green olives, 1 oz almonds, 1 tbs craisins, 2 tbs homemade good seasons dressing (less oil recipe)
S: (if hungry) apple, chopped and nuked

According to Livestrong, all of this is approx 1300 calories for the day.

Tonight will be cardio, since tomorrow will be a Tuff Girl workout with heavy weights AND cardio.
So, it's either going to be this:

OR This:

Both of these amazing workouts are found on the FIT2FLEX website - I LOVE this blog, and the workouts are amazing!

Not sure how many calories this will burn, but I am leaving a little room for 1/2 deli flat and 1 tbs PB later tonight if my stomach starts eating itself.

This is a problem - I really, really, really, want a great heartrate monitor that will help me keep track of things like this. I don't want to drop a chunk of change on something I'm not going to love. Any suggestions?? I have the fitbit, and it's *ok* - but for stuff like this, it does NOT track accurately!

Ok, I think I have bored you long enough! I may be back (insert evil laugh. I'm not sure why, it just seems appropriate)

Wednesday, May 23, 2012


I am tired of this SCREWING AROUND.
I have been between the same 10 lbs for like, a freaking YEAR.
I belong UNDER 200 lbs.
I DESERVE to be UNDER 200 lbs.
I have been SO close for TOO long.
YES, it is about my recovery from being a compulsive overeater, and a sugar addict.
BUT, this ALSO has to be about losing the last of this damn weight.

I have re-established my goals.
My initial goal is under 200 - so, I guess, technically, 199.
Then, it is 180.
At last, it will be 165.
That will mean I will have lost 200 lbs on this journey.
I am walking my 12 step program and I am getting my ass in GEAR.

Are you waffling around too?? Who's in this with me???
Let's DO THIS.

This is going to be the GETTIN' IT DONE SUMMER, BABIES!!!

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Your neighbors will think you're crazy...

Well, strength trainging did not happen last night. I decided that things like deadlifts with 10 lbs bars are just not effective. SO, I did this cardio workout that I go from this awesome blog Fit2Flex. It's called the "My neighbors think I'm Crazy" Workout, found HERE
This is how it goes:

I did it 4x, and finished off the last leg with 20 pushups to start, and then did plank variations, 10 more pushups and fast jabs to end this bad boy. DAMN. I was WIPED! I did high-knees instead of sprints, because it was pouring outside and I was confined to indoors.

I even got my 5 year old in on the action. He was in it with me for the first 2 rounds... then he just started dancing around to the music I had on! He is ridiculously cute!

Food for today... I gotta get of the coffee! I am slowly removing caffeine. I've gotten rid of the diet soda during the day. It's really, really not good for you. I'm still having a little with dinner. Baby steps. :-)

My food plan today is woefully short on veggies, so I am going to up that at dinner tonight and do a dinner salad with 1/2 sweet potato... not sure on a protein yet. Gotta check the freezer.Also going to bake some kale tonight (which my kids love, too) and maybe cook up some homemade sauce.

Ok, gotta run... stay strong, peeps!

Monday, May 21, 2012

Upping my game

Guys, for REAL my Rugged Maniac is only 4 months away. I had a dream on Saturday night that I was there and I was so far behind everyone, that I had to ask someone if they would cut me off, because I was taking so long. Excpet in the dream, there was a written test - I have a feeling that's not exactly true!

So, that all being said, I am upping my fitness game. I have been Sah-Lack-Ing! So, this is the fitness plan:

Weights/bootcamp 3 days per week - 2 with Tuff Girl, 1 home or at the gym
Cardio 2 days per week - both home, or at the gym

So, I keep forgetting I have a gym membership. I know. Lame. But it's to Planet Fitness, and frankly I only joined so I would have a place to run over the winter and I hardly went because I just chose to run outside. Oh, that, and 'cause it was cheap. I miss my other gym, where I had spinning, and zumba, weight classes and childcare... *sigh*...

I also feel odd going to the gym and going into the free weights section. It's ususally filled with muscley guys and I feel awkward. I have to get over this... or, I can use the machines, I guess... I dunno. I would love to just stay home and do it, but that would mean going out and buying much heavier weights... I only have up to 10 lbs, and even on my lightested weight exercise, I am doing at LEAST 15! Tonight, I am going to look around the house for some substitutes to use for the heavier weight exercises.

Damn. I'm tired just re-reading that... lol. I'm still fighting the cold, so I know that is playing a factor. I felt so horrible, that I cancelled my last Wednesday AND Saturday Tuff Girl workout. I mean, UNHEARD of. Seriously. But I knew there would be no way I could really bring it. I'll be back there this coming Wednesday, back into the routine.

Food front: I am going to keep it as clean as possible. I am cutting down on, but NOT cutting out, reduced fat cheese. Besides cheese, I'm not really doing any dairy except for a little greek yogurt. Veggies, fruits, good fats, lean proteins...

Ok, well, there is the plan. I hope my cold doesn't get in the way of a good strength session tonight...

Later, peeps!

Friday, May 18, 2012

This is incredible. Never Give Up.

Come to the Cabaret....

Thank you all once again for  responding to my last post - it's so nice to know you are all out there! :-)

I was home sick yesterday, exhausted, throat sore, chest throbbing, body aching. Ugh. I'm at work today, but probably not for the whole day.

I missed a meeting Wednesday night. I was in bed by 7, fevered and awful. I am sad about it - but what can you do? Progress, not perfection. So, I guess I am striving for 89/90...

Oh yes, one other thing I did yesterday was pray to God that I would be able to sing tonight. We have been working on this cabaret concert for FAR too long. We have had WAY too many conflicts, and it is finally here. I just prayed that I could get through and give a good performance, even if it means falling over for the rest of the weekend. For anyone interested, the cabaret is a review of Tony Award winning shows. It's going to be great - Classics to contemporary, we have it all!

This show is close to me right now for another reason, as well. I think it may be one of the last times I will perform. I am still the VP for the Board of Directors and co-founder for the company, and that won't change. But I think I will be pretty strictly in "producer" land from now on. Doing it all is too much, especially with a hubby that is the president, and his primary love is performing. Both of us performing doesn't work - rehearsals, performances, etc... with 2 kids? Who will need sitters for all of those rehearsals and performances? And me, in classes? It just doesn't work. I want to be spending MORE time with my boys, NOT less!!

I have spent much of my life performing, and giving it up is not something I do lightly. But it simply must be done.

Sorry, I know non of this is directly weight-loss related. But really, weight-loss/Healthy Lifestyle/Battling addiction... it's all intertwined with the rest of our lives. They all effect each other.

So, I think the Good Lord heard my fervent prayers, and I feel like I will be able to sing tonight. I have NO idea how I will feel after, but that is neither here nor there. Tonight is the focus.

Stay Strong, peeps!

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Sickies and such

I loved the responses I got from the question posed at the end of my last entry  - what is your relationship like with the scale. The responses were a mirror of myself. Crys from Bigger than my Body (Who is recovering from Gastric Bypass - go give her some love!) hit the nail on the head when she says she is on the scale after every time she pees when it's being good to her, and it's under the bathroom sink when it's not telling her what she wants to see. I totally hear that!

I also love the attitude of Joy (who is my HERO and just ran a half marathon! WOOT!) who says regardless of what the scale displays, she just keeps pushing through! She is basing her success on the fit of her clothes and how she feels. Go figure!

So, I'm sorry that, yet again, I have not updated in a hot minute... it's been hectic. Sick husband, sick kids, and now I'm coming down with whatever it is too - 2 days before a performance. No Bueno! Prayers are really appreciated that I can hold on through Friday night!

I have had my slips, but I have to keep moving forward, one decision, one choice at a time. If I start to dwell, it will lead to days/weeks of binging/eating poorly. Move on, move on...

I am also struggling to not revert into "what if's" - you know, those pesky thoughts that start to crop up - "What if you had just had enough willpower to not slip up so much? You would be to your goal weight by now!" Thoughts like this begin to prevade me - they then move to the negative self talk that drives me into the sugar and into my solitude. Hiding the from the world with ice cream container in one hand, spoon in the other...

SO - The "what if's" have to GO! Out, damn spot!

This leads me to the weekend - now, peeps, I need your help. Weekends are super hard. I'm not sure what else to do to get through them without some kind of slip. Anyone else out there have trouble on the weekends? How do you deal? Suggestions?

That's all Ihave for the moment, because frankly, I am wiped out. I may try to go home early...

Later peeps...

Thursday, May 10, 2012

12/90, scale-less journey

Day 12 of my 90 meetings in 90 days challenge. I really didn't think this would be a "challenge" in the way I am used to doing a challenge. But, it really has been. I had to break from studying for finals to go to meetings. I need to carve out time to do meetings even when my attention is needed in many other places (hubby, kids, house...) But I have been doing it. Almost always, I feel I read something that I needed to see, or I share something I needed to get off my chest. I like to read the shares. It helps so much to know that I am not alone in my "insanity".

I am still not getting on the scale. I had stepped on last week to acknowledge where I was (post super-struggles with eating for what seems like forever) and I was up a few lbs. Nothing crazy (Thank you, Lord!). But, I think I really know now that the scale is not my friend. Not even when it shows me the numbers I want to see. It's not a marker for the important things. The important things being:

1. recovery
2. eating food good for my body, and mind
3. Moving my body

I know that if I am doing these things the way I should be, the nubmer on the scale doesn't NEED to matter. I am being healthy. I will lose weight.

Weight loss has become such a different animal for me. I became SO used to seeing that number drop quickly when I was "on task" that when it DIDN'T - FREAK OUT! It's not going to happen that way anymore! I'm not going to drop 5 lbs in a week doing healthy things for me! So, to avoid this constant learning curve, I am simply staying off the scale.

I said a few posts back, in order to gage my weight loss, I am using 2 pairs of pants I bought recently. I have not tried those on again yet. I think I will do that to get a good picture of the progress on 5/31 (yes, this date was just chosen arbitrarily! lol) It's exactly 3 weeks from today.

I am officially in training at Tuff Girl 2x per week. I went there last night straight from work... wow, SUPER difficult to do that kind of workout after an already full day, but I pushed through. My sore legs are testiment. Amazingly enough, I have found that I am weaker in cardio than in weight training. All body-weight movements last night using the TRX, jam balls, gliding disks and battle ropes... I have a love/hate relationship with battle ropes! I was absolutely exhausted, sweaty and shaking when I left there last night. But I am determined to kick ASS at the Rugged Maniac run in September!

So, what is YOUR relationship like with the scale? Healthy? Unhealthy? If you think it's unhealthy, have you ever considered using a different method to track your progress?

Alright, I think I have rambled enought for now. Soldier on, peeps!

Tuesday, May 8, 2012


WHEW! I can't believe it's been a week since I posted! Sorry about that guys! It's the end of the sememster, and time was not my friend the past week. I am happy to say that I am DONE with my biology class (expecting an A) and tonight is my Dietetics final project due and Final exam, and then.... I am DONE until the end of August!

I seriously need this break. I've said it already, and I'll say it again. I am SO glad I decided not to take a summer course!

I have done some internal work on my recovery/abstinence. I will always be a work in progress. I am in-perfect. My eating will not ever be "perfect".. because my definition of Perfect does not exist. There is always *something* wrong with it. And if there are too many *somethings* wrong with it - my brain likes to go into Black/White mode. It goes something like this:

"Look, you have already had more carbs than you should. Just forget it. Go ahead and eat some ice cream. You have to start all over again tomorrow, anyway"

On really bad days it sounds like this:

"You are such a f*ck up. Why do you even bother. Loser"

Which drives me to seek comfort in my drug of choice.

Yeah. Good times.

One of my major tasks is to get out of Black/White mindset. There are too many days where the numbers aren't always going to be perfect. So, what, I'm going to over eat compulsively on those days, and make it WORSE?? I know, it seems like a totally *DUH* thing - I can't explain my insanity. All I can do is strive for sanity and peace.

So, getting myself out of this mindset takes some getting used to. I have to talk to myself and God a LOT.
One bite of something does NOT equal binge time. It is a time to move on. It's a time to let go of the obsession.

I'm a work in progress. Of course.

I've been eating well. Actually, last night I was AMAZING - I actually took ice cream out of the freezer (I know, I know... we normally don't even have it in the house, but it was there from a gathering this weekend) and had the spoon in my hand. I stopped. DO I really want to do this? I am hungry. This won't sure that. All it will do is promote guilt, sadness and anger. Put it away.

And I did.

I went instead to my go-to snack. 1 granny smith apple, cut up and nuked for 1-2 min till it's warm and a little soft (I can't eat raw apples because of an allergy) and 1 tbs of natural PB mixed in. Awesome.

It was a proud moment.

So, I'm here. I'm walking my program. I'm starting at Tuff Girl Fitness 2x per week now, SO excited!

Off to take my last final of the semester! WOOT!

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

4/90. For today...

Last night was the 4th meeting in my 90/90. I'm not sharing too much lately. I feel like I'm still establishing what I am calling "my walk" in my program. I know I will feel when it's right to share with the group.

Things challenge you when you are an emotional/compulsive eater. Any time turmoil, or even joy occurs, you feel the need to cope or celebrate with food. It's a habit that needs constant attention. I've had a very challenging day, because hubby and I got really crappy news about an upcoming performance of our theater company. We are working on saving it, but it's very stressful. We may have to let a LOT of people (including ourselves) down, after a lot of work. The space we were booked in to perform in just over 2 weeks has booted us. We have NO place to perform as of this moment. Work in progress.

Today, I am constantly giving it all up to HP. Whatever it is meant to be, it will be. If we have to cancel, after giving it every try we could, it will be disappointing. But eating over it will not change it. So, why put myself in a worse place by doing that?

I feel the worst for my hubby. This is his dream - to run a theater company. We will keep moving forward, regardless of what happens to this particular performance.

The menu for today is basically the same as the day before. My food is not "perfect" today. Not my totally, pedestal-worthy-pristine-perfect idea of it. But it's ok. There is no obsessing. There is no binging. There is no sugar. Calories are great. Why should I ask for anything more? I won't ask for more. Not for today.

So, if any of you don't already follow Stephen, well, you should. Because he has lost 300 lbs. Yes, you read that right. He's battling a shit-ton of stuff. He's fighting the good fight. He's DOING IT. Check him out. For real.

Sorry for the short post - I'm running to class for the first of my final exams. Wish me luck!

Tuesday, May 1, 2012


My countdown to Rugged Maniac is on hold, (Blog title-wise, only) because I have another countdown to concentrate on.

In my 12 Step program, I have committed to 90 meetings in 90 days. It's a pretty big undertaking. But, I will do it. This will be day 4, but I am only actually counting the days that meetings have already occured, thus, so far, I have attended 3 of my 90.

There's LOTS of countdowns I could put in there - like the one till the end of school!

I have 3 more exams in the next 6 days. All finals. All stressful. But then, oh rapture, school will be done for the summer.

I am SO happy I decided to give myself the summer off of classes!

Another nice note on school: I've been asked to join the honor society Phi Theta Kappa. I've NEVER been an honors student, or on the Dean's List before I came back to school, and now I am both. I was never "smart enough" for that. And yet, here I am. :-)

Alrighty, the menu for today is pretty much the same as yesterday. Yes, I am a creature of habit. Especially when it comes to food. I am eating what I enjoy, what is good for me, and what does NOT feed my addiction.

Click Protein Coffee. (That's right, Day 2 Starbucks Free!)
2 Morningstar sausage, 2 tbs natural PB
1/2 sweet potato, 3 oz ground chicken breast with mexican spices and salsa, 2 oz 75% reduced fat cheese
2 more oz of same cheese, 1 oz almonds
Dinner will be a big salad once I get home from class. All measured and weighed.

Been a little lax on the exercise front... I'm still very active, but the past few days I have not done anything "hardcore". Yet another reason I can't wait till classes are done - so much time in the evenings to workout!

So, all in all, I am here. I am working my personal program one step at a time (sometimes one teeny, tiny step!) and I will never, ever, ever give up.